How Do We Help People?

Most of us like to help people in some way. Maybe not all of us enjoy helping people in the same ways, but generally, people usually enjoy helping people. There is no right or wrong way to help someone, nor a right or wrong amount. Whether the deed is small or large, and whether it is one person or a thousand, the impacts go a long way regardless.


If you’re sitting there reading this, and saying to yourself, “Yeah, that sounds like me. I like helping people,” then I have one question for you.


Have you ever asked yourself, “How do I actually help someone?”


Sounds like a silly question, right? To an extent it is, because each scenario is different in its own way. But this question is powerful.


Let’s take a look at three unrelated examples of different people who may need some sort of help:


  1. A person contemplating suicide
  2. A person struggling to identify what coffee to order from a barista
  3. A person confused as to which company to apply to work for


As evident by the list above, each demonstrates a person who is in need of some sort of help, because they may not be able to identify a solution to the situation on their own.


Looking at this list, you may be thinking to yourself, “There is nothing in common with these three cases other than that they all are in need of some help.”


What I challenge all of us to look at when presented with opportunities to help someone is not at just what they need help with. It’s about taking it deeper than that by focusing on why they need that help.


There is one commonality that these examples have and that everyone in the need of help has…


They are in a battle with their false beliefs.


We must understand what their false beliefs are, and help identify the truths to those false beliefs.


What is a false belief? Pretty self explanatory…it is something we believe or perceive as true that is really not true.


The false beliefs are the why to the what people struggle with.


That is the way to truly help people…to uncover those false beliefs. And that goes for every instance.


So back to the examples, let’s break down what each false belief might be and how we can help them understand the truths instead.



  • A person contemplating suicide


    1. Possible False Beliefs: “My life is over. I am not worthy of living. I’m a failure. I don’t have a positive future.”
    2. Truths: Everyone who is granted life is worthy of life. You do have a positive future if you learn what is going wrong and create a plan for improvement. The current challenges can be overcome and life can and will get better if you choose that path.



  • A person struggling to identify what coffee to order from a barista


    1. Possible False Beliefs: “All coffee is too strong for me. They put too much sugar in all their drinks. There are no healthy options.”
    2. Truths: Coffee can be made differently to adhere to your tastes. They can customize the amount of sugar they put in. There are healthier options such as black coffee, teas, or handcrafted options with less pumps of syrup.



  • A person confused as to which company to apply to work for


    1. Possible False Beliefs: “I’m not good enough to work for a good company. There are too many more qualified applicants than me. What if I choose the wrong company?”
    2. Truths: Upon applying and finishing the interview process, if you are selected, chances are it was meant to be if you got the job. And if you didn’t get the job, it is also meant to be. Though there may be better applicants and employees, you can still use your strengths for great accomplishments. You’ll never know it is the wrong or right company, or decision, unless you try it out.


The point isn’t necessarily to look into these examples literally, though it certainly couldn’t hurt. The point is that in each of these cases, there is a need…help.


But where the change is made is not only recognizing the need for help, but additionally, knowing that in order to help someone to the best of our abilities, we must identify what their false beliefs are.


Converting false beliefs to truths is how to help.

That is the spot where real change is made.


Think about it….for all of us, there are so many things that we think we know, but we really don’t. Helping people transition that thought, opinion, or doubt to truth is the best way to help people.


Because our goal for everything in life should be to seek truth. Not opinion.

Truth gives us assurance. Truth provides knowing. Truth removes any possible doubt.


So let’s help each other identify our false beliefs to discover real truths.


Can you identify one false belief you have that you may need help on discovering the truth on?


How are you going to help someone this week with the new approach of understanding false beliefs?